I invented a dance it is called the velociraptor.

2003-11-04 - 7:51 p.m.

now i can finally add a proper entry... I went home for the weekend and i type up a note and that was my last entry but i really didn't say anything about what was going on... well i read M's diary yup yup... well if you read my last entry you know that, well she is wrong about how i feel.. she is not ugly! she is hot, absolutely beautiful in an undescribible way.... uhhhhhh mmmmmmmm...... woah icecream....snowcones, cold showers... hehehe. I never write like this i feel weird. ugh! Well i am back with my ex-gf now my gf. but i told her before we started dating again that i love M and that if it came down to it i would go with M which is harsh but i don't want to lead her on that i am only interested in her (her being my gf) when i am not... well its sorta like that song by Smokey robinson "I don't like you but i love you seems that i am always thinking of oooohhh you treat me badly i love you madly you really got a hold on me" if i could just add and I like her(M) and i love her, seems that i am always dreaming of her, ohhh i treat her badly, but i love her madly i've really got no hold on me... well i am notorious for loving multiple people at once but i swore to GOD or whatever that i WOULD NOT CHEAT NO MATTER WHAT ON my gf EVEN IF M WAS LIKE I LOVE YOU LETS DO IT IN THE ROAD... i would be like no. no no no no no no no!!! I have a girlfriend who i love and respect and adore! i will not make out with you!!! maybe i am just to chipper right now for my own good as i am not even taking my own feeling seriously... shitty bum bum... But i am serious about my gf as i had loved her actively for 6 years and counting like i said, but i don't think i trust her like i do M. but i know that M is not ready for a relationship with me. So i am going to be with my gf in hopes that i can continue to be friends with M and have a relationship with one of the women i love... I know the previous entry seems to say that i love only M but then again it is a letter and i never gave it to her because i thought about it and it is misleading... i wrote it a week ago not that i didn't love my gf a week ago.. why am i acting like my diary is the spanish inquisition? well i'll tell you... I guess it's because nobody here at school or anybody at home seems to understand why i do the things i do or feel the way i do which is almost impossible to explain without reveiling everything about my past with my gf... which i have told very very very few people... and i really don't know if i want to tell anymore people including the people that might read this... not that i don't trust you all but ya know everytime i tell someone about our past people seem to think i am insane that i must be crazy to still talk to my gf let alone want to be with her..

.trip. - .fall. - .bounce. - .ashes ashes . - .we all. - .fall down.

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Don't Make Me Hug Myself, I'll Do It!


*HUGS* TOTAL! give lesbfriends6 more *HUGS*
Get hugs of your own

............................................................................................I trail off in one sentence out of five

..........................................................................and the rest of the time I just.....

.......................................................................................................................mumble...............................................

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