I invented a dance it is called the velociraptor.

2003-09-29 - 10:11 p.m.

fight myself, i have to fight myself

i have to

fight myself again

don't want to be a useless patch of wallpaper that covers the wall which you scribble your name on. I have my own name and it changes all the time

i was born with a capital v

for victim or voyage which ever occurs to me.

I wanted so much to believe someone could be different to me.

i came in a box

on which it read some disassembly required

and so i shall leave

i was momentary comfort, flattery for your morbid curiosity,

i bet you said lets give the sick girl something more to fight.

blood is running in reverse trying to escape knowing you

feeling you, and your so tired of this bullshit and you say everyone can fuck off and die. You used to say you didn't want me to die. When i stop breathing though, your never there, but its always you blocking the air.

I can't understand why you want to hurt me so much more than i already am. I have already been ravaged by those i thought loved me. Why do you want to be an addition...

i know i am difficult all the time. I know i make it impossible to move with responsibility. I don't know why i act the way i do, so needy so nervous so hurt, i know there is no point you'll never see that i am just living on in picture and memories of liquor turned to pills, that company i gave away or lost still keep of me. so break the mindset, this is not a tragedy. A game of push and pull i play with you to get you near or throw you away battle within myself for either way i will hurt you. But how to do it less. I can't tell you how last week when we spoke on the phone i stopped beating for 30 seconds and the deafening of your wordless breath made me want not it's return. we spend so little time occuring to each other i wonder where all that time was spent. you say i need to be more blunt with you, but i know doing so just wears you thin.

i feel really sick right now i am going to bed.

.trip. - .fall. - .bounce. - .ashes ashes . - .we all. - .fall down.

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Don't Make Me Hug Myself, I'll Do It!


*HUGS* TOTAL! give lesbfriends6 more *HUGS*
Get hugs of your own

............................................................................................I trail off in one sentence out of five

..........................................................................and the rest of the time I just.....

.......................................................................................................................mumble...............................................

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